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Agenda

“Hi there!” Ashley balanced her iphone on her shoulder while she poured herself a glass of red wine and tried to sound relaxed. “I’m glad I finally reached you!”

“How have you been? I’ve been meaning to call you back...” Ann waved her arms above her head to get her husbands attention and silently mouthed, “It’s Ashley.” He rolled his eyes in response and bent back over the puzzle they had been working when the phone rang.

“I’m good. Well, you know, its been tough. Can you believe its been six months since the breakup? That’s actually why I called,” Ashley perched on the edge of the kitchen chair momentarily, and then stood and walked over to stare out the window of her apartment, “I need your advice. I think I just got ghosted by someone on a dating app and I am trying to decide how to respond.”

Ann let her arm drop to her side, hung her head back and gave a long slow exhale before responding. “Well...if you really want to know what I think... I think that this guy probably isn't the one you are looking for anyway.” Ann peeked into her kids bedrooms and shut their doors softly before speaking again, “But Ashley, have you...”

“I hear you,” Ashley interrupted. “Its just weird. He had been texting everyday. And calling every few days. Then he rescheduled our video chat, and then never called. It just doesn't feel...right?”

“Its probably not. But remember you’re just a random girl he met on a dating app last week.”

“I know. I mean its been three weeks, but whatever. I know it seems silly, but I remember when my ex and I started dating....well, I mean, I don’t know, maybe my expectations are too high?”

Ashley hoped that her long silence would force Jessie to really hear what she was about to say, “I don't think you should be dating yet.”

“He is already in a new relationship. How is that even possible?”

“I don't think that matters.”

“How I am supposed to get over him when I am stuck at home in a pandemic.”

“I don't know, Ashley. But if you are going to date now, this won’t be your forever love, this will be your rebound. Try talking to many people, not just one. And be honest about what your agenda is.”

“I only want to love one person though.”

“Right, well, I don't think its gonna be this guy.”

“So you don’t think I should call this guy again?”

“Right. Do not call him. Keep scrolling.”

“Okay. How are you? How are Peter and the kids?”

“Oh gosh, Its been completely great and a total disaster having everyone home. The kids are stir crazy, Peter complains he can’t get work done, and the dog has diarrhea. But I keep reminding myself that we wanted more time in the house with each other, and thank goodness we bought this bigger place, our apartment would have been maddening! But, listen, Jessie, we just got the kids in bed so I am going to go spend some time with Peter. Hang in there, okay.”

Jessie clicked end on the call. Nice, she thought. I am sitting over here alone and broken-hearted, needing to connect with someone, and she treats me like an irritating distraction from her life. And yet, I have been there every time she needed me since high-school. Fuck her.

She walked to the kitchen without her phone - the first time she had set it down since her Tinder match hadn't called last night. As she uncorked a new wine bottle she promised herself silently that she wouldn’t call anyone tonight. “Then maybe don't have more wine, dumbass,” she said aloud as she poured another oversized glass. But there was nobody there to hear her, and that was the problem. 

Jessie walked directly to her phone and scrolled through to find the right contact and hit dial. “Hi there! Is Jessie. Just wanted to reach out - wasn't sure if you were dialing me last night or if I was meant to dial you. Either way, it seems we missed each other....no big deal. I fell asleep super early - was trying to watch that Tiger show everyone is talking about. Give me a call later. Hope you are doing well. Thanks. Bye.” 

Jessie turned her phone over on the table, as if to undo what she had just done, and drank her wine. 

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